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Archives for 2015

Stuff That Makes You Go Hmm

December 6, 2015 by

Chicago, 2115.
Chicago, 2115.

People always ask me why I tend to favor pictures of sexy women on my blogs. The answer is easy, I like sexy women. If you like pictures of sexy men I suggest you go visit my buddy David Onassis. His pages are festooned with them. He’s also a nice guy and it won’t kill you to meet a nice person once in a while. Anyway, sexiness aside, there’s been a lot happening in the wonderful world of science and I thought today might be a good day to fill in some gaps. NO! Not the sexy gaps! Sheesh, I leave you alone on the interweb for a lousy minute and you get all pervy on me. No, I mean the gaps in your knowledge. I’m tired of writing about mass shootings. Let’s just admit it. If people truly want change they need to get out and vote. If they don’t, just get used to the weekly “thoughts and prayers” bullshit. And then buy bullet proof everything. Or move. Either works. I’m also a little burned on the whole super hero thing right now. Don’t get me wrong, I will see every single film and show as they come out, but writing about them becomes redundant after a while. I’ve completely stopped writing about Florida and its ilk simply due to the fact there are only so many ways to make the phrase “Wal-Mart meth lab” funny. Worse still is Texas which has fallen into the realm of self parody. I wrote a blog once entitled Nude Texas Ugly Bacon Vibrators and it made sense.

So, instead, I’d like to take a moment to talk about useful stuff.

Let’s start with something simple. M. M. Sullivan wrote about a handy invention that allows people to turn polluted water into pure drinking water. Even better, it tells them all sorts of stuff about water safety and other hygienic issues.

Each year, 3.4 million people die from water-related diseases, and many of those deaths are the result of a lack of knowledge about what water is safe to drink.

Finally, there is an affordable and effective answer to solving the world’s drinking water crisis. The Drinkable Book is the first-ever education-water filter hybrid. Not only do the pages teach readers about water safety, but the pages themselves are filters that can reduce waterborne bacteria by over 99.99%!

That’s right, a simple book with synthetic pages could save over three million lives a year. He’s got videos and more so make sure to check it out. And, yes, it’s available now if you’re thinking about a cool holiday gift for the Red Cross or something like that.

Speaking of synthetics, Justine Alford writes that science is pretty darn close to creating synthetic shrimp.

Shove over those lab-grown burgers; we need to make room for the synthetic shrimp on the barbie. Yep, scientists are no longer just working on trading our beloved beef for a greener alternative, but seafood too. Rather than trying to grow a meaty feast from stem cells, though, startup New Wave Foods has opted for a slightly different approach: algae. And while the team hopes to eventually create a range of faux seafood, they are focusing on shrimp for now, and for good reason.

The world has developed a real hankering for these crustaceans. Over the past few decades, global production of shrimp has more than tripled, and it’s estimated we now eat more than 6 million tons of them each year. It’s popular worldwide, but it’s the favorite seafood in the U.S., with citizens peeling their way through about 2 kilograms (4.1 pounds) each per year.

Needless to say, our hunger for shrimp is a big problem. We could try and reduce our consumption to tackle these issues, but trying to take meat away from man is about as easy as taking a bone from a dog. Opting for a similar approach to the veggie burger that “bleeds,” New Wave Foods is going for natural sources and trying to mush them together into a meaty, flavorful formulation. Their ingredient of choice is algae, or more specifically those that shrimp typically dine on anyway. This means getting a similar nutritional value to real shrimp is fairly easy, the team reported to Motherboard, but as always texture is proving tricky. Apparently, they’ve also managed to nail the flavor, but they won’t spill the beans as to how they did this.

At the moment our two main sources of shrimp are farming and trawling, both of which have serious repercussions on the environment and ecosystems. You’re probably aware of the consequences of trawl fishing: catching unwanted species, or bycatch. Shrimp trawling is said to have the worst rates for this out of all fishing techniques, with up to 2.7 kilograms (6 pounds) of unintended species per half kilogram (one pound) of shrimp sometimes caught up in nets, which includes turtles, sharks, dolphins and small whales. Not only that, but dragging the nets along the seabed also destroys it.

But by no means is farming a sustainable alternative. Important habitats are sometimes cleared to make way for shrimp farms, including mangroves, the loss of which can have a huge impact on coastal areas given their role as wildlife havens and buffers from the effects of storms. In addition, huge amounts of pollution, including waste and antibiotics used for growth, can leach out and contaminate other water systems.

I have friends who have tried the vegan meat products listed above and claim they’re, finally, the real deal. Since one friend is a cattle rancher, I’ll take their word on it. Anyway, one side benefit of synthetic shrimp is that people with shellfish allergies will now be able to eat shrimp until they can’t eat shrimp no mo.

In other synthetic news, a few weeks ago I wrote about how science had found a way to send huge amounts of data via light, instead of radio, waves. Victoria Ho writes that some other scientists said, “Ah, hell, that’s easy” and went and developed Li-Fi.

The world might eventually have to shift its reliance on Wi-Fi to Li-Fi, an alternative technology that scientists say can reach speeds of 1 Gbps in real-world use — 100 times faster than average Wi-Fi speeds.

At those speeds, you could download a high-definition movie in just a few seconds.

A company called Velmenni told the IBTimes UK that it took the technology out of the labs and into real-world offices and industrial environments in Estonia, where it was able to achieve those speeds.

Li-Fi transmits data using LED lights, which flicker on and off within nanoseconds, imperceptible to the human eye. It was invented in 2011, and in the lab, has been able to reach a mindblowing 224 Gbps.

Unlike Wi-Fi signals which can penetrate walls, Li-Fi is based on light and can’t, so its range is theoretically more limited. However, because of that limit, Li-Fi is also potentially more secure from external sniffing.

Li-Fi also opens more possibilities for smart home appliances. In the future, LED lightbulbs for the home could serve two functions — lighting up a room and helping to create a network in the house for devices to talk to each other.

Traditional cable companies are bidding on the tech now. Believe it or not they can use existing technologies to make it all work. The expense would be minimal.

So what else has science done with light? Would you believe “invent time travel?” Mary-Ann Russon says you should.

The (University of Queensland) scientists simulated the behaviour of two photons interacting with each other in two different cases.

In the first case, one photon passed through a wormhole and then interacted with its older self.

In the second case, when a photon travels through normal space-time and interacts with another photon trapped inside a closed timeline curve forever.

“The properties of quantum particles are ‘fuzzy’ or uncertain to start with, so this gives them enough wiggle room to avoid inconsistent time travel situations,” said co-author Professor Timothy Ralph.

“Our study provides insights into where and how nature might behave differently from what our theories predict.”

Although it has been possible to simulate time travel with tiny quantum particles, the same might not be possible for larger particles or atoms, which are groups of particles.

As she notes elsewhere in the article, there are reasons time travel is problematic.

The grandfather paradox states that if a time traveller were to go back in time, he could accidentally prevent his grandparents from meeting, and thus prevent his own birth. However, if he had never been born, he could never have travelled back in time, in the first place.

The paradoxes are largely caused by Einstein’s theory of relativity, and the solution to it, theGödel metric.

They won’t know what the results of their experiments will cause until they replicate them in different labs. But the basic idea is that you can go back and not cause your own death. Which is a good start.

Okay, but what about sound? Can’t we do anything with sound? I saw a sonic screwdriver on Dr. Who and that seemed kind of cool. It was and it is and Science Alert says it might be the way we cure Alzheimer’s.

No, I’m not kidding.

Publishing in Science Translational Medicine, the (Queensland Brain Institute) team describes the technique as using a particular type of ultrasound called a focused therapeutic ultrasound, which non-invasively beams sound waves into the brain tissue. By oscillating super-fast, these sound waves are able to gently open up the blood-brain barrier, which is a layer that protects the brain against bacteria, and stimulate the brain’s microglial cells to activate. Microglila cells are basically waste-removal cells, so they’re able to clear out the toxic beta-amyloid clumps that are responsible for the worst symptoms of Alzheimer’s.

The team reports fully restoring the memory function of 75 percent of the mice they tested it on, with zero damage to the surrounding brain tissue. They found that the treated mice displayed improved performance in three memory tasks – a maze, a test to get them to recognise new objects, and one to get them to remember the places they should avoid.

“We’re extremely excited by this innovation of treating Alzheimer’s without using drug therapeutics,” one of the team, Jürgen Götz, said in a press release. “The word ‘breakthrough’ is often misused, but in this case I think this really does fundamentally change our understanding of how to treat this disease, and I foresee a great future for this approach.”

The team says they’re planning on starting trials with higher animal models, such as sheep, and hope to get their human trials underway in 2017.

I think that’s enough for one day. I don’t want to cause permanent brain freeze for anyone. Suffice it to say some people have done some very cool stuff that will benefit us all.

By the way, should you run into an idiot who claims we don’t need science, just send them here and ask them when’s the last time ignorance saved millions of people.

Romance In Plastic Minor from SHOOT THE BOSS on Vimeo.

Listen to Bill McCormick on WBIG (FOX! Sports) every Friday around 9:10 AM.
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Filed Under: Uncategorized

Squanto Was a Dick & Other Holiday Faves

November 27, 2015 by Bill McCormick

This is as historically accurate as anything you heard about Squanto.
This is as historically accurate as anything you heard about Squanto.
Everyone has their holiday traditions. Eating black eyed peas for New Year’s. Going to a Sadie Hawkins’ dance for Valentine’s Day. Getting hammered to honor an aesthetic patron saint. Wallowing in pagan fertility rituals to commemorate the resurrection of Christ. Using high explosives to celebrate our peaceful freedoms. Dressing up as sex starved maniacs who just escaped from a cave to revere our dead ancestors and, of course, memorializing the birth of a man dedicated to poverty and peace by spending spending fucking obscene amounts of money and fighting like wet cats over a toy. But the one holiday that seems pure is Thanksgiving. After all, we have the stories and history straight from the Pilgrims’ mouths. Right? How could we get that wrong? As I noted back in 2013, we get that spectacularly wrong as well. As soon as the Pilgrims were fed and survived that first winter their “red skinned allies” quickly became “bloodthirsty savages” so they could justify taking their land and resources. And that’s just the most obvious problem.

[EDIT] It has come to our attention that the Mayflower not only brought the Pilgrims to the US but also orphans the British government no longer wished to support (i.e., feed). Most of them died within the first year.

Read on to get completely depressed.

********************************

I have often called Thanksgiving the red headed step child of holidays. Now I have made red headed step children mad. So I’ll apologize to them – sorry, I tend to be a callous oaf – and just note that this holiday kind of gets shoved in the middle of other stuff. Most people go from the sexy cool of Halloween to the fiscal gluttony of Christmas without pausing. It’s gotten so bad that Sarah Palin was forced to announce she was against the War on Christmas in October. So you can see how Thanksgiving could get trampled. And now, with more and more stores caving in to pubic pressure to be open on the holiday so people can shop on Gray Thursday, my new name for the day before Black Friday, the holiday is taking another hit. I’ve already noted that there are, historically, several days that have earned the title “Black Friday” and none of them have anything to do with shopping. Since this year the Thanksgiving radio show will be today I figured I should take a moment to remind people how screwed up this day really is. For example, kiddie pageants all over the country celebrate out faithful Indian companion, Squanto. As I have noted before, that presents a problem.

In fact when Squanto, the liaison between the Wampanoag Indians and the Pilgrims, died he was eulogized by William Bradford, the Pilgrims’ governor, with these words, “Here Squanto fell ill of Indian fever, bleeding much at the nose, which the Indians take as a symptom of death, and within a few days he died. He begged the Governor to pray for him, that he might go to the Englishman’s God in heaven, and bequeathed several of his things to his English friends, as remembrances. His death was a great loss.” Of course part of his conversion was probably due to the fact that the Wampanoag considered him a traitor, many historians believe he was poisoned by his own people, and even went so far as to assign him a second (a/k/a assistant) for his dealings with the Pilgrims. That was, pretty much, unheard of for Indians.

Yeah, well, given that Squanto was, for reasons unknown, shunned by his tribe, captured and made a slave, taken to Europe, escaped 6 years later to return to America, was shunned again by his people and then taken in, reluctantly, by the Pilgrims who offered him the worst eulogy ever. And the eulogy was due to the fact that his own people probably poisoned him. While a more interesting story than the one you’re used to it makes for a difficult children’s show.

Also, that “assistant” thing I mentioned was unheard of for the Indians. By treaty, hammered out by years of inter-tribal wars, each tribe assigned one voice for negotiations. So if that voice said the tribe would paint themselves pink and do the Hokey Pokey the tribe would simply say where and when. Assigning a second voice was a huge insult to Squanto and he would have known that.

There’s something else to consider as well. About 100 years previous there was a colony in Roanoke Virginia. According to people who have no clue about what they’re talking about, the colony disappeared without a trace. Even worse, they left a sign that no human can decipher with the word CROATOAN on it.

NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Okay, say hi to the Croatoan Indians, also known as members of the Lumbee Indian family. Yes, they still exist and their web site is current. The settlers, as was common with English settlers, were woefully ignorant and arrogant. They crossed the ocean and just expected to find plenty of food and shelter. Oddly this wasn’t a good plan. While the land had been tended by the Indians who died out from the plague earlier, food still requires agriculture, a skill that eluded these city bred immigrants. So, hungry and lonely, they walked about two miles down river to the Croatoan settlement where the natives were naturists.

In other words their options were starvation and death or an island full of naked natives who were willing to share their food. They wisely chose door number 2.

Now, as I noted, English settlers were ignorant and arrogant. The Pilgrims were no different. When they arrived and found blue eyed, red skinned, natives who spoke English it never occurred to them that there might be an interesting story behind that. In fact they barely mentioned it. Because, just like in Star Trek, that’s the way things were supposed to be.

Oh, and Squanto wasn’t one of those. He learned English the old fashioned way, from his captors.

Anyway, thanks to Coolest Holiday Parties, we have a list of stupid trivia for you to win bar bets with.

The traditional cornucopia was a curved goat’s horn filled to brim with fruits and grains. According to Greek legend, Amalthea (a goat) broke one of her horns and offered it to Greek God Zeus as a sign of reverence. As a sign of gratitude, Zeus later set the goat’s image in the sky also known as constellation Capricorn. Cornucopia is the most common symbol of a harvest festival. A Horn shaped container, it is filled with abundance of the Earth’s harvest. It is also known as the ‘horn of plenty’.

It was not until 1941, that congress declared Thanksgiving as a national holiday. It was declared to be the fourth Thursday in November.

The first known thanksgiving feast or festival in North America was celebrated by Francisco Vásquez de Coronado and the people he called “Tejas” (members of the Hasinai group of Caddo-speaking Native Americans).

Here’s one of those funny Thanksgiving facts: Turkeys have heart attacks. When the Air Force was conducting test runs and breaking the sound barrier, fields of turkeys would drop dead.

Turducken, a turkey stuffed with a duck stuffed with a chicken, is becoming more popular in Thanksgiving (originated in Louisiana). A turducken is a de-boned turkey stuffed with a de-boned duck, which itself is stuffed with a small de-boned chicken. The cavity of the chicken and the rest of the gaps are filled with, at the very least, a highly seasoned breadcrumb mixture (although some versions have a different stuffing for each bird).

Fossil evidence shows that turkeys roamed the Americas 10 million years ago.

91% of Americans eat turkey on Thanksgiving Day.

There are regional differences as to the “stuffing” (or “dressing”) traditionally served with the turkey. Southerners generally make theirs from cornbread, while in other parts of the country white bread is the base. One or several of the following may be added: oysters, apples, chestnuts, raisins, celery and/or other vegetables, sausage or the turkey’s giblets.

Thomas Jefferson thought the concept of Thanksgiving was “the most ridiculous idea I’ve ever heard.”

Every President since Lincoln proclaimed Thanksgiving Day. But in 1939, 1940, and 1941 Franklin D. Roosevelt proclaimed Thanksgiving the third Thursday in November to lengthen the holiday shopping season. This upset people.

Fifty percent of Americans put the stuffing inside the Turkey.

The North American holiday season (generally the Christmas shopping season in the U.S.) traditionally begins when Thanksgiving ends, on “Black Friday” (the day after Thanksgiving); this tradition has held forth since at least the 1930s.

On the West Coast of the US, Dungeness crab is common as an alternate main dish instead of turkey, as crab season starts in early November.

Corn is one of the popular symbols of thanksgiving. It came in many varieties and colors – red, white, yellow and blue. Some Americans considered blue and white corn sacred. The oldest corns date 7000 years back and were grown in Mexico.

Benjamin Franklin wanted the national bird to be a turkey.

Several people wanted to have an official day of thanksgiving, including George Washington, who proclaimed a National Day of Thanksgiving in 1789. Several people did not want it including President Thomas Jefferson.

Here’s one of the most unbelievable Thanksgiving facts: The Guinness Book of Records states that the greatest dressed weight recorded for a turkey is 39.09 kg (86 lbs), at the annual “heaviest turkey” competition held in London, England on December 12, 1989.

The first Thanksgiving was not a feast, but rather a time when Native Americans helped Pilgrims by bringing them food and helping them build off the land.

More than 40 million green bean casseroles are served on Thanksgiving.

Turkey is the traditional dish for the Thanksgiving feast. In the US, about 280 million turkeys are sold for the Thanksgiving celebrations. There is no official reason or declaration for the use of turkey. They just happened to be the most plentiful meat available at the time of the first Thanksgiving in 1621, starting the tradition.

Twenty percent of cranberries eaten are eaten on Thanksgiving.

The preliminary estimate of the number of turkeys raised in the United States in 2005 is 256 million. That’s down 3 percent from 2004. The turkeys produced in 2004 weighed 7.3 billion pounds altogether and were valued at $3.1 billion.

Turkeys were one of the first animals in the Americas to be domesticated.

Columbus thought that the land he discovered was connected to India, where peacocks are found in considerable number. And he believed turkeys were a type of peacock (they’re actually a type of pheasant). So he named them “tuka”, which is “peacock” in the Tamil language of India.

The ‘wishbone’ of the turkey is used in a good luck ritual on Thanksgiving Day.

The cranberry is a symbol and a modern diet staple of thanksgiving. Originally called crane berry, it derived its name from its pink blossoms and drooping head, which reminded the Pilgrims of a crane.

The Plymouth Pilgrims dined with the Wampanoag Indians for the First Thanksgiving.

The different nicknames for Thanksgiving Day: “Turkey Day” (after the traditional Thanksgiving dinner), “T-Day” (an abbreviation of either “Thanksgiving Day” or “Turkey Day”), “Macy’s Day (this is exclusive to New York City – it is a reference to the Macy’s Day Parade), “Yanksgiving” (Canadians sometimes call the Thanksgiving in the US as “Yanksgiving” to distinguish it from the Canadian Thanksgiving holiday.)

The First Thanksgiving lasted for three days.

Contrary to popular belief, Native Americans did not eat cranberries. They did, however, find them extremely useful for dying fabric and decorating pottery.

The Native Americans wore deerskin and fur, not blankets.

A spooked turkey can run at speeds up to 20 miles per hour. They can also burst into flight approaching speeds between 50-55 mph in a matter of seconds.

Turkeys are first documented over two thousand years ago in Central America and Mexico.

In October of 1777 all 13 colonies celebrated Thanksgiving for the first time; however it was a one-time affair commemorating a victory over the British at Saratoga.

There are three places in the United States named after the holiday’s traditional main course — Turkey, Texas; Turkey Creek, La.; and Turkey, N.C. There are also nine townships around the country named “Turkey,” with three in Kansas.

Sarah Josepha Hale, a magazine editor, campaigned to make Thanksgiving a National Holiday in 1827 and succeeded.

Wild turkeys, while technically the same species as domesticated turkeys, have a very different taste from farm-raised turkeys. Almost all of the meat is “dark” (even the breasts) with a more intense turkey flavor. Older heritage breeds also differ in flavor.

Actually, Sarah Josepha Hale started campaigning for Thanksgiving in 1827 but it wasn’t designated as a holiday until Lincoln signed the Thanksgiving Proclamation in 1863.

Old Abe did love his proclamations.

Listen to Bill McCormick on WBIG (FOX! Sports) every Friday around 9:10 AM.
Visit us on Rebel Mouse for even more fun!
contact Bill McCormick
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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: croatoan, indian, pilgrim, plymouth, squanto, thanksgiving

Your 2016 Mapped Out

November 25, 2015 by Bill McCormick

Not Margot Robbie.
Not Margot Robbie.
One of the fun parts about doing The Big Wake Up Call every Friday, at 9:10 AM (CT/US), is interacting with the listeners. They call, they write, they send smoke signals. Whatever they can think of to get my attention. I even had one young lady figure out which bar I frequented and show up there. I’m sure I won’t need a restraining order. But there is one thing we do on the show that I kind of gloss over here. And that is stuff about superhero movies. It’s not that I don’t like writing about them, it’s just that there are so many click-bait sites dedicated to them that I hate to end up lumped in with them. Still, every now and then it’s worth the risk. Since this is a holiday week, and you’ve got some time to kill, I figure today’s as good a day as any to jump into the fray.
[Read more…] about Your 2016 Mapped Out

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Playing the Race & Religion Game

November 24, 2015 by

Do you think the zebra pillow cases are a bit much?
Do you think the zebra pillow cases are a bit much?
Recently Donald Trump’s Twitter account busted out the most racist, and factually inaccurate, graphic anyone (who’s not a member of the KKK) had ever seen. It showed that 8 out of 10 whites who were murdered were murdered by black people. Common sense tells you that’s bullshit, but common sense has very little to do with what Trump is selling. He, and the rest of the Republican Presidential candidates, except for John Kasich who doesn’t stand a blowjob’s chance in a nunnery of winning, are all about pandering to people’s basest instincts. You can tell someone is doing that whenever you hear them say “Everyone knows …” No, everyone doesn’t. In fact, I would be hard pressed to find a small room full of people who “know” what they’re spewing.

“The majority of (insert religion) want to kill you.” No they don’t. In fact we’re going to play a numbers game in a minute based on just that subject but, first, I’d like to give all my non-racist readers a reason for hope.

After World War One Germany was subjected to the Versaille Treaty. This was the closest thing to bureaucratic rape the world had ever seen. In the old days conquering armies would kill your men, rape your women and steal your wealth. That was back when things were kinder and gentler. The Treaty of Versaille upped the ante dramatically. It destroyed Germany and left it with no hope of ever becoming a viable country again.

The people were angry and looking for someone to blame. In the middle of that cauldron roiling with anger fell the Great Depression. At its height, in Germany, a wheelbarrow full of money might, if the baker was a nice person, get you a loaf of bread.

Now, here’s what you need to remember. Germany was one country, mostly one race, spoke one language, lived in one time zone, was increasingly isolated, and needed one target for their rage. Along came Adolph and his Merry Band of Miscreants, and he gave them one; the Jews. Oh, sure, he tossed in fags, dykes, Catholics, and anyone of color too, but those were the icing on the cake. The real dough, both literally and figuratively, was in the Jews.

Keep this in mind as I continue.

There is now a vocal movement in America that closely resembles Hitler’s early Nazis. They’ve substituted Muslims for Jews – hey, why not? They’re all middle eastern – and tossed in fags, dykes, and anyone of color too. They don’t discriminate when it comes to discrimination. The main difference this time around is there is a large enough number of Catholics who agree with them that they get left off the hate train.

At least for now. Given Pope Francis’ stance on stupidity I don’t see that lasting.

There are other differences too. Unlike post war Germany, America has multiple races, a fuckton of prominent languages, four time zones (excluding Hawaii & territories), and is drifting towards inclusion as opposed to isolation.

A big reason for that last statement is the fact that by this time in 2050, the United States of America will no longer have an Anglo majority. For the smart people that means they’d better learn to get along with their new neighbors or move.

To which I might ask, “move where?”

There are only two countries in the world aligned with Trump’s beliefs and social policies who also have enough infrastructure to handle the influx of his supporters. Those would be Iran and Saudi Arabia.

If you click the previous link you’ll read what was noted here back in 2012;

NEITHER allows the teaching of evolution; BOTH require prayer in schools; NEITHER allows gay rights, especially not gay marriage; NEITHER allows abortion; women in both countries know their place and don’t complain about it; everybody and his brother owns a gun; BOTH are theocracies run strictly by the laws of the old testament; and BOTH have populations with very few Black people and NO Mexicans. It’s practically paradise! Conservative Heaven on Earth!

I’m not worried about Trump claiming to be a Christian any more than I am about any of his followers. He’d sell his wife to a dog food company if it suited his goals. Seeing his toupee howling Alluha Akbar isn’t a stretch at all. The same holds true for his followers once they figure out the benefits to them.

Most of them seem to be incapable of reading a bible anyway, let alone following it.

“But, what about all those Muslim terrorists?” you whine. Good question. What about them?

“Where are they?”

Best question ever.

Let’s run some comparisons to help you out. There are 142 registered Neo-Nazi groups in the US. By “registered” I mean they have Facebook pages, places to hang out, and so on. There’s no ‘registry’ at Bed Bath and Beyond for hate groups.

There are another 72 chapters of the Klan. In Chicago our chapter is called the United Northern and Southern Knights of the Ku Klux Klan. Feel free to visit them. Some of them have lovely rainbow colored robes.

You’ll note that irony isn’t a thing with racists.

Let’s take them at their word and say they each have around 1,000 members. Radicalized racists, if you will.

Obviously this doesn’t include “soft” racism. The kind that denies people jobs, homes, or fair rates at a bank. Then those numbers go up dramatically. And sadly. In this regard the U.S. is the tenth most racist country in the world, with India coming in #1.

Gandhi would not be pleased. God knows I’m not.

Okay, back to our radicalized racists.

Let’s start with the Klan.

72,000 armed Klan members, if they banded together, could take over cities like Parma, Oklahoma or Lubbock, Texas. They would be able to do so since the local police in places like that are poorly trained and likely to sympathize. Also, there’s a lot of empty land around them they could use to fortify their positions.

The 142,000 Neo-Nazis, banded together, could take over cities like Nashville, Tennessee or Atlanta Georgia. Again, they would be able to do so since the local police in places like that are poorly trained and likely to sympathize. And, again, suburban sprawl around those cities is thin. They could easily entrench themselves there.

Other members and sympathizers could, should they wish, wreck havoc on soft targets in major cities. Bombs, shootings at nightclubs, the occasional public transportation massacre, and so on.

In neither case could they take over this, or any other, country.

Let me know if any of those scenarios sound familiar to you.

Now, on to Muslims. There are 1.75 Billion of them on the planet. Many talking heads on Fox News claim that 10% of them are radicalized. That would put 175,000,000 armed maniacs on the ground. That number could wipe out America, Canada, and Mexico in short order and then take on the world.

Even if all you watch is Fox News you know that hasn’t happened.

Not that the real number of Daesh members, a/k/a ISIS, a/k/a ISIL, is tiny. It’s not. There are an estimated 200,000 of them. Just a hair more than the number of armed Nazis in the US, and able to do about the same amount of damage.

Which is about where they’re at. They control an amount of real estate slightly smaller than Britain, but a lot of that is empty land or previously held by nomads or peasants.

Not exactly prime targets.

I’m not denigrating the people who live in those places. The reason there are so many refugees, multiplied by those fleeing the civil war in Syria, is due to the fact they’re not big fans of Daesh and its allies. Just like most Americans aren’t big fans of Neo-Nazis or the Ku Klux Klan. If those two groups embarked on the scenarios I posited above there would be millions of people fleeing. Hopefully nice countries like Canada, France, and Saudi Arabia would take them in.

Saudi Arabia? Yep.

You see, for better or worse, they are ruled by the Holy Qu’Ran. That book includes the Five Pillars of Islam. One of those pillars is called Zakat. It is widely interpreted to mean all followers must provide charity to those in need. Simply put, they don’t count refugees as refugees, so they end up not getting counted on the U.N.’s list. Instead they count them as “brothers and sisters in need” and just take them in.

Oddly, despite their inherent racism and backwards attitudes towards anyone different than them, they apply that rule to anyone who asks for help. They’re not well versed in irony either.

When you see that fatuous graphic showing all those empty tents in Saudi Arabia you need to keep a fact in mind.

I know, I know, facts are annoying.

Anyway, those tents are set aside for people who make the Hajj, a/k/a the annual pilgrimage to Mecca. So Saudis don’t put people there. They can’t risk them being occupied when the holy time arrives. Instead they put the refugees, sorry – brothers and sisters in need, in their homes or hotels or where ever they can. They have taken in several hundred thousand brothers and sisters this way. Including over 100,000 children they have enrolled in their schools. Just not a single “refugee.”

This is why words matter. As Neil Steinberg noted, calling the terrorists “radical Islamists” is a disservice to both words. They are no more adherents of Islam than Neo-Nazis or Klan members are Christians.

Fun side note. A growing number of Neo-Nazis are renouncing Christianity in favor of Odinism. All that peace and love shit makes them itch, so they’re joining a cult with a warrior ethos. Yes, they’re perverting its core beliefs too. They have to justify their hate somehow.

Call me when you hear the phrase “radical Odinists” on Fox. I’ll buy you a drink.

The point is, there aren’t nearly as many assholes in the world as you are being led to believe.

So why don’t we, or the Saudis, or anyone, just bomb the fuck out of them? Mostly for the same reason we wouldn’t bomb Parma, Lubbock, Nashville, or Atlanta. The terrorists hide amongst innocents. A rough guess averages the numbers of innocents at around ten per terrorist. I’ve seen estimates as high as fifty per terrorist. Either would be about the same as if the U.S. cities I noted, and their surrounding areas, above got over run. No matter which number you use that’s a lot of innocent lives we would be taking. Too many have already been lost this way, and that’s with everyone being as careful as they can.

So we tough it out. Knowing that, in the long run, they can’t win. Daesh has neither an air force nor a navy. They are stuck where they’re at. That’s why President Obama, correctly, professed they’re contained.

Are they still a threat? Absolutely. To individuals. Maybe a small city or two. Not to nations. That doesn’t mean we should discount them, it just means we should measure our responses and base them on reality. Then provide aid where we can.

Or, to make it real simple for you, don’t fear the victims.

Listen to Bill McCormick on WBIG (FOX! Sports) every Friday around 9:10 AM.
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Friday the 13th

November 13, 2015 by

I think we've covered them all.
I think we’ve covered them all.
Superstitions are silly things. Some are mere mnemonic devices that have taken on a life of their own. Don’t walk under a ladder is a good example. From a purely practical standpoint someone might drop something on your head. The same applies to opening an umbrella indoors. If you do that you suddenly have lots of sharp objects, the ribs and the tip, in an enclosed space where you could, literally, put someone’s eye out. 666 is supposed to be the number of the beast in Revelations. People believe this even though it’s been proven wrong on a few occasions. You see, some idiot monk, who lacked basic arithmetic and translation skills, wrote it wrong. The actual number is 616. Dr. Ellen Aitken, from McGill University, sums it up best. ““It’s a number puzzle — the majority opinion seems to be that it refers to [the Roman emperor] Nero. Revelation was actually a thinly disguised political tract, with the names of those being criticized changed to numbers to protect the authors and early Christians from reprisals. It’s a very political document. It’s a critique of the politics and society of the Roman empire, but it’s written in coded language and riddles.” In other words, it no more foretells the future than your weird Aunt Emma.

Cracked mirrors are another one. Some folks believe that mirrors don’t just reflect your awesome visage, they keep part of your soul. In backwards countries and in the American South people still cover mirrors when someone dies to prevent their souls from being trapped inside of them. The fear of black cats dates from the days of the plague and belief in witches. They were supposed to be familiars who served demonic masters and so on. It’s a mess. Look, I’ve owned several black cats and only one was even a little demonic and that was only when he was hungry.

I could go on and on and on and on and … you get the idea, but I won’t. Superstitions are the veils that tiny minds use to hide the light of reality.

A little over two years ago I wrote a nice history of Friday the 13th. It was, and is, festooned with those fact things you never find on the Internet any more. So, in honor of our current dose of Triskaidekaphobia, I give you Friday the 13th, UNFILTERED!!!

MU HU HA HA HA

+++++++++++++++++++

If you happen to be a prestidigitating paraskevidekatriaphobic then today is wrought with horrible magic for you. For the rest of us it’s another day that’s just as good or bad as any other. Today, if you watch the news, you will be assaulted with lists of all the horrible things that have happened on Friday the 13th through the years. The first will be the fall of the Knights Templar at the duplicitous hands of King Philip IV of France and Pope Clement V on Friday the 13th in October of 1307. That one’s a juicy one since it features the only publicly recorded curse attributed to God. Jacques de Molay, as he was about to be burned at the stake, claimed that God would strike both Philip and Clement dead for their deeds and, indeed, both men were dead within less than two months.

You will also hear from many noodle headed experts who will claim this is an ancient tradition, some will say dating back to the bible. These people are, using the technical term, deluded morons. Fridays have been bad news for a while, even Chaucer wrote disparagingly about them in his Canterbury Tales back in the 1,400’s. And the number 13 has, for reasons lost in the mists of time, been one to avoid since Babylon reigned supreme in the Middle East. It is even highly likely that Jesus knew about the superstition and selected the number of His apostles to prove the belief baseless. That would fit well with many of His reality based teachings.

But for any reference specific to Friday the 13th you need to be far more modern.

In 1907 an author named Thomas Lawson released a novel called “Friday the 13th.” In it a man uses superstition and greed to con a bunch of people and manipulate the stock market and cause it to crash. It was a popular book at the time and is also the first recorded use of Friday the 13th. So much for ancient and mystical. If you’re over 50, your grandparents could have had a slightly used copy of this book.

They may have even noted the eerie similarities in his book to the real stock market crash of 1929.

Still other featherheads will point to the 1993 study published in the British Medical Journal which compared the number of auto accidents on any given Friday the 6th versus Friday the 13th and said “Friday the 13th is unlucky for some. The risk of hospital admission as a result of a transport accident may be increased by as much as 52 percent. Staying home is recommended.”

Smart people just went “Hey, wait a minute, that research is horribly flawed.” And they are 100% right. When you compare Friday the 13th with other stressful days such as tax day, major holidays and so on, the accident rate falls right into the norm. In other words, events that cause people to stress out also cause them to become distracted and those distractions lead to accidents.

You know that phrase “It’s all in your head?” Well, in this case it’s true.

Just FYI, the word paraskevidekatriaphobic comes from the Greek; Paraskevi means Friday and dekatreis means 13. You can also call the fear of Friday the 13th Friggatriskaidekaphobia in honor of the Norse God Frigga whose name is where the word Friday comes from.

Yeah, a little etymology to brighten your day.

Okay, now for some meaningless fun.

In Spanish speaking countries, people fear Tuesday the Thirteenth or Martes Trece as it is called. The reason is that that was the day that Constantinople fell to the Ottoman Empire. That tradition does date back hundreds of years and is well documented.

In Italy, home of the Catholic Church and what many believe to be the root of the superstition, the number 13 is considered lucky and the day they avoid is Friday the 17th. So, go figure.

Some folks can’t resist tweaking their noses at superstitions. Black Sabbath released their debut album on Friday the 13th in February of 1970 and they did okay. The 13th book of A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket (a/k/a Daniel Handler) was released on Friday, October 13th, 2006 and he’s made goo-gobs (that’s a financial term) of money. And Adventure/Quest World, an online video game featuring the music of one of my faves, Voltaire, features famous guests every Friday the 13th.

This year there will be three Friday the 13ths and they are spaced 13 weeks apart.

Heh.

But, far be it for me to deny you something legitimate to worry about. On April 13, 2029 (a Friday), the asteroid 99942 Apophis (named after an angry Egyptian god) will come so close to the earth that it will be closer to our atmosphere than our man made satellites. If it gets caught in our gravity well it could do damage of apocalyptic proportions.

Or it could just ricochet harmlessly off into space.

Listen to Bill McCormick on WBIG (FOX! Sports) every Friday around 9:10 AM.
Visit us on Rebel Mouse for even more fun!
contact Bill McCormick
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