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You are here: Home / Spandex & Leather (Just Like Mom Liked It)

Spandex & Leather (Just Like Mom Liked It)

May 19, 2015 by

Not Jared Leto.
Not Jared Leto.
This is going to come as a shock for certain sections of the internet (yeah, I’m talking to you fan-boy) but not everything needs your approval. When CBS greenlighted Supergirl it was clear that their whole line of thought was “Arrow is popular, Flash is popular and these guys made both.” There’s nothing wrong with that, but it is a bit shortsighted. Fortunately Andrew Kresiberg, the show’s creator, is not. Instead of trying to make Supergirl an estrogen powered Superman, he decided to develop a character who’s interesting in and of herself. Which means she needs a real secret identity and a life outside of wearing a cape. And since she’s a girl, she needs a girl’s life. More specifically, a 24 year old insecure girl’s life. Because, unlike her famous cousin, she did not embrace what she was right away. The reasons for that could be myriad, but just wanting to fit in is hinted at several times in the trailer. Speaking of the trailer, CBS, once they realized what they had, did something unprecedented. They didn’t release a minute or two of a teaser, they released six minutes that showed both her day to day life as well as her super powered one. I watched that trailer with my nieces, aged 14 to 19. To say they were exuberant would be a massive understatement. They finally had a super hero built just for them. And like Kara Zor-El in the show, they squealed on the couch as they watched things unfold. This, of course, has made fan-boys livid. The attacks on the show devolved quickly. Simply put, unless women are secondary (at best) characters they hate it. CBS, trembling in fear, is ready to laugh all the way to the bank. You see, as of this writing, 8 of the top 20 films are female oriented. And this is a family friendly female led show. Plus they get the tone right. When she does her serious face in the scene with alien hating military dude, that is a face that every parent has seen and knows well. It is not the face of a mature woman making a reasoned decision. It is just the face of raw determination. She even got the nod right. Assuming the show doesn’t suck, and my friends who have seen completed episodes assure me it doesn’t, then CBS will be sitting on a gold mine and millions of young woman will have something fun to dream about.

Okay, off my soapbox.

James Hunt, over at Den of Geek, has a point by point breakdown of all the fan-boy complaints if you feel the need to delve into this further.

Another show that came out of nowhere and is catching some fan-boy ire is Legends of Tomorrow. This is a show that no one asked for, should never have made it off an assistant’s desk and it’s going to be fucking awesome. That link will take you to the first look trailer for the show. Fun fact, they assembled the cast, got them in costumes and stuck them on a roof just to shoot the trailer. Not a frame has been shot for the show. As far as I know that scene may not even be part of the show. They just needed something to show the nice people at CW that they hadn’t lost their fucking minds. And, when you watch the trailer, you can understand the concern. The “rag tag group of misfits who have to come together” trope has been played to death. Plus, aside from Arrow and Flash making appearances here and there, all of the characters are nobodies. As one fan-boy so eloquently put it “NO NO NO NO THAT’S FUCKING WRONG!! WHERE IS LANTERN? WHERE IS ANYONE BUT THESE ASSHOLES?!?!?!?!” And so on, but you get the idea. Couple this with the fact that this show will have two strong female characters with interesting back stories (a recently dead assassin and a reincarnated alien) and you have a recipe guaranteed to piss off fan-boys the world over. And, guess what? The nice people at DC and CW just don’t care. Not anymore. The fan-boys held the comics world hostage through the 80’s and early 21st century. If it wasn’t white and in tights it wasn’t right. However, during that same period is when DC & Marvel began noticing a growing movement of fans who weren’t all that pale and some of them had curves in all the right places. So characters representing an array of different lifestyles and ethnicities started coming to the fore. And people who connected with those characters started joining the comic book universes and coming to conventions and basically making themselves known. This show, which will have a wide array of diverse characters surrounding the leads, comes directly from that. And they don’t need to have famous characters from the comic books, they just need to have interesting ones. And if they can’t make a recently dead assassin and a reincarnated alien interesting they may as well just stay home.

The Sy-Fy Network has also greenlighted a show that was clearly designed by someone who spent way too much time experimenting with hallucinogens. The show, called The Magicians, is kind of like Harry Potter on acid. And I say that as a good thing. While there is a complete lack of spandex there is plenty of leather, knee high, boots and floating women and playing cards. It’ll all make sense when you click on the link. “Magic is a drug” is a common theme. Oddly, this show is based on the books of Lev Grossman whose characters have been called “the least likable people on the planet.” And yet …. I can’t wait to see this.

In bizarre news, over thirty years after the original came out, Jonathon Betuel is preparing to foist a sequel to The Last Starfighter. Not a remake, not a reboot, an honest to God sequel. This is such a dangerously bad idea that it might work. A film featuring a forty-something dude who lives in a trailer park and plays video games may be just what the fan-boys need.

Another movie that no sane person asked for, Underworld 5, has been greenlit and will, once again, feature Kate Beckinsale as Salene. If you know what that means you’re excited. If you don’t, let’s move on.

A move that fan-boys and rational humans alike have been asking for is finally getting made. Marvel Studios head, Kevin Feige, confirmed that they have taken over the rights to Gargoyles and will be making it into a live action film.

“I’ve always wondered why the hell Disney never decided to turn Gargoyles into a blockbuster movie event,” Feige added. “But when I expressed an interest they literally begged me to take it off their hands, along with Quack Pack and The Mighty Ducks. The sci-fi animated version of The Mighty Ducks, not the good one. Man, the things we could do at Marvel with that Emilio Estevez movie… but if Gargoyles goes over well, maybe they’ll let us take a crack at it.”

Kevin Feige noted that although Marvel Studios will be producing the Gargoyles movie, they’re not seriously considering connecting the franchise with the Marvel Cinematic Universe… yet.

“Although Marvel Studios will be producing the Gargoyles movie, we’re not seriously considering connecting the franchise with the Marvel Cinematic Universe… yet,” Kevin Feige elaborated. “But the good news is we have tons of actors under multiple film contracts, and we could literally throw them into any movie if we wanted to. Robert Downey Jr. would make a great Xanatos, and we may force him to play Brooklyn as well, because why the hell not? People love that dude. What day is it again? I have stuff to do.”

He’s kidding about the Robert Downey Jr. stuff, I promise you. That said, this is the perfect guy to be in charge of this franchise. He knows and loves the characters and he has the resources to pour into a project to ensure it comes out top notch.

Of course, if you like your super-heroines to be created with a budget akin to a bag of Cheetos, here you go.

"Ferus" Full Trailer #1 (NSFW) from Ferus on Vimeo.

Listen to Bill McCormick on WBIG (FOX! Sports) every Friday around 9:10 AM.
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