Archives for May 2013

Tomorrow is Cinco de Mayo. A minor holiday in Mexico but a complete blowout here in the US. That’s fine. Lots of holidays – St Patrick’s day, Hanukkah, etc. – mean very little in their homelands but become exciting excuses to drink here in America. Also exciting excuses to drink are; Sanforized toupees, the correct spelling of cat, cartoon penguins, finding a penny, art films with gratuitous nudity, two ply, yo-yos (plural only), sun dresses, free wi fi, side boob, unibrows, … the list goes on an on. Let’s face it. Americans will use any excuse to have a drink. If they can have those drinks while carrying a loaded weapon, then so much the better. But the one thing Americans are still coming to grips with is public nudity. However, there are those who are chipping away at that taboo. Regular readers of this blog know that today is, the internationally celebrated, Naked Gardening Day. If you click that link you will just see regular folks gardening in the buff. It’s not nearly as exciting as you might think.

While this holiday may appeal to the four people who still read Mother Jones and listen to NPR, how do we reach a wider audience? Our old pal, David Moye, says the answer is simple; make it Star Wars Naked Gardening Day!

Star Wars fans are nakedly emotional about their love for the Lightsaber saga.

On May 4, some will just be getting naked for the first ever “World Naked ‘Star Wars’ Gardening Day,” a 24-hour period when geeks from Endor to Tatooine and all points in between celebrate the film franchise by … gardening naked??

The clothing-optional holiday is actually a hybrid of two existing May 4 holidays: Star Wars Day, a day when fans say “May the fourth be with you” to each other (presumedly followed by shrieks of laughter) and World Naked Gardening Day, , a 24-hour period where people are encouraged to water plants sans clothing.

This hybrid holiday is the brainchild of Ritch Duncan, a columnist at Dumb As A Blogand a big “Star Wars” geek. He’d like to admit he came up the concept a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, but he’d be lying.

“I just thought of it,” he admitted to The Huffington Post. “I was writing up something about ‘Star Wars Day’ anyway and then someone told about World Naked Gardening Day and I decided to combine the two.”

Duncan suggests people who want to join in on the festivities have a lot of options, such as getting several friends to wear nothing but Tuskan Raider masks and then garden in single file lines, “to hide your numbers, but nothing else.

Other suggestions he made on his original post include:

• Wear nothing but a Chewbacca Bandolier, with laser-crossbow themed trowel.
• Get naked and paint your face red and black like Darth Maul. Attach another rake to the handle of your existing rake for “nude double lightsaber raking action.”
• Don’t wear a costume. Just strip down, garden, and keep repeating “Size matters not. Judge me by my size do you?”

Another option: “You could turn Stormtrooper helmets into gardening pots,” he said.

Surprisingly, Duncan hasn’t spent much time imagining which “Star Wars” characters he’d like to see garden naked.

“I’d hate to have George Lucas digitally add clothes later,” he said.

No word on how many people will actually garden naked “Star Wars” style, but Duncan is asking people who do to tweet pictures to @DumbasaBlog with the hashtag #nakedstarwarsgardening.

Meanwhile, Mark Storey, one of the originators of World Naked Gardening Day responded to inquiries about their reaction to the Sci Fi co-opting of their event with loud giggles.

“More power to him,” Storey added.

Regular readers also know that I am not, normally, a fan of Star Wars.

I think I summed up why very nicely on January 8, 2011;

There has always been a clearly defined line between Start Trek fans and Star Wars fans. Star Trek’s are the more cerebral of the two. Fans not only follow the shows, they learn new languages, discuss how Paul Dirac’s theories on anti-matter, when coupled with Einstein’s theory of relativity, could truly lend credence to the argument for faster than light travel and often will worry about the socio-economic impact that one culture could have upon another. It is not uncommon to find Star Trek fans knocking back a couple of frosty cold adult libations over a game of 3D Chess all while contemplating the vagaries of nonlinear quantum mechanics and noting that Lt. Uhura was seriously hot. This hotness has been noted in the re-imagination of the character as well.

Star Wars fans, on the other hand, really just like toys.

That being said I still think that we, as right minded Americans who stand for all that is pure and holy, should support Ritch Duncan and his mad quest. I can see no greater path to peace than millions of butt naked people wearing silly masks. There is no way you can start a war when you’re dressed like that.

DARTH from cinema by moses on Vimeo.

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Last week, on the radio version of this blog (as heard on WBIG), my facilitator, Ryan Gatenby, was amused by the fact that science is close to creating real life X-Men. He wondered aloud if that would mean that we might, one day, meet a modern rendition of Prince Namor the Sub-Mariner. Given that the character of Namor has vacillated between wanting all humans dead and hosting nice parties at the U.N., I’m not sure we want someone that unstable to have super powers. That became even more true when I flipped open my robot search engine this morning and discovered 100 mile long tsunami like waves that could kill us all. The good news is that they can only be seen from space because they are deep underwater and they pose no harm to us yet. The bad news is that a guy like Namor would have complete control over stuff like that. And a guy with super mutant powers who hates us wouldn’t do anything to harm shipping or people now would he? Of course not. You just stop worrying.

But while I worry about legitimate threats like the emergence of a Namor, many people are worried about stupid stuff. Ker Than, over at National geographic, says that there are a lot of people who believe stuff that is patently untrue.

Conspiracy theories are as American as apple pie. A national poll released this week by Public Policy Polling (PPP) found that some popular conspiracy theories in the United States have persisted for years, like the belief that a UFO crashed in Roswell, New Mexico, in 1947.

Meanwhile, new theories have gained believers, such as the ideas that Saddam Hussein was involved in the 9/11 attacks and that Osama bin Laden is still alive.

Perhaps not surprisingly, many of the ideas in the new poll are based on a misunderstanding of science—or a stubborn refusal to acknowledge it.

Here’s a reality check on some of the science-related conspiracy theories from the survey:

1. A total of 37 percent of American voters believe global warming is a hoax.Most (58 percent) of the people who believe this identified themselves as Republicans. Of those who don’t believe global warming is a hoax, 77 percent are Democrats.

Reality Check: Numerous scientific studies have confirmed that the Earth is warming and that the rate of warming is increasing. Average temperatures have climbed 1.4°F (0.8°C) around the world since 1880. Much of the temperature increase happened in recent decades, coinciding with a spike of carbon dioxide and other greenhouse gases emitted into the atmosphere as a result of human activity.

The effects of global warming on the natural world are equally well documented: Arctic sea ice is now thawing at historic rates, flowers are blooming earlier, and the migration patterns of birds and other animals are changing.

2. A total of 29 percent of voters believe aliens do exist. Another 21 percent believe the U.S. government covered up a UFO crash near Roswell, New Mexico, in 1947.

According to PPP, more Americans who supported Mitt Romney for president last year (27 percent) than those who supported Barack Obama (16 percent) believe in the UFO cover-up.

Reality Check: It hasn’t always been the case, but many astronomers today are open to the idea of life existing elsewhere in the universe—and even to the possibility of intelligent alien life. That’s thanks in large part to the relatively recent discoveries of hundreds of so-called exoplanets—worlds beyond our solar system—and thousands of planet candidates. Most scientists think it’s only a matter of time before a habitable, rocky, Earth-like twin is discovered.

Even our own solar system might contain evidence of alien life. NASA’s Curiosity rover recently discovered tantalizing evidence of clays and minerals that scientists say could only have formed in water. The implication: Ancient Mars had the conditions and ingredients necessary to support life.

As for UFOs, most sightings are eventually linked to more mundane causes. For example, a recent video by actor Russell Crowe purportedly capturing a UFO outside his office was likely reflected sunlight from a plane passing near sunset.

3. Some 20 percent believe childhood vaccines are linked to autism. These voters believe that childhood vaccines against mumps and other diseases could increase the risk of developing autism.

Reality Check: A recent government study confirmed what many scientists have been saying all along: There is no connection between the number of vaccines a child receives and his or her risk of developing autism.

The study, published last month in The Journal of Pediatrics, also found that even though kids are getting more vaccines these days, those vaccines contain fewer substances that provoke an immune response.

4. The poll revealed that 14 percent believe that Bigfoot is real. Another 14 percent said they were not sure, while 72 percent said they do not believe Bigfoot is real.

Reality Check: Despite several attempts to prove Bigfoot exists, no one has presented evidence that has withstood scientific scrutiny. Indeed, many such “proofs” have turned out to be outright hoaxes. In 2008, two men claimed to have found a seven-foot (two-meter) tall, 500-pound (230-kilogram) Bigfoot corpse in the woods of northern Georgia, but the body was later revealed to be a rubber ape costume.

Last November, another group claimed they had done DNA tests that proved the “North American Sasquatch is a hybrid species, the result of males of an unknown hominin species crossing with female Homo sapiens.” The researchers touted the fact that their study was published in a scientific journal called DeNovo—but it seems the publication was created especially for that Bigfoot study.

While Bigfoot is likely just a myth, that’s not to say that no new, close relatives of humans have ever been found—it’s just that all of them are long extinct. For example, in 2010, scientists announced that a 40,000-year-old pinkie bonefound in a Siberian cave belonged to a previously unknown species of ancient human called Denisovans.

5. Some 9 percent believe the government adds fluoride to drinking water for “sinister” purposes.

Reality Check: The latest evidence that fluoridated water has dental health benefits comes from a 2013 study published in the Journal of Dental Research. The study found that fluoride in drinking water prevents tooth decay in adults regardless of age, whether or not they drank fluoridated water as children.

Other recent evidence of the dental benefits of fluoride came from an unlikely source: A survey of more than 23,000 skeletons from medieval archaeological sites in Britain showed that people who lived near the coast—and presumably consumed a lot of fluoride-rich fish—had fewer cavities.

6. A total of 7 percent of voters believe the moon landing was faked. Another 9 percent said they weren’t sure whether the Apollo moon landing really happened.

Reality Check: Believers of this particular conspiracy theory have painstakingly dissected video and photos from the Apollo 11 moon landing looking for evidence that it was faked. For example, some have pointed out that the American flag Neil Armstrong planted on the moon appears to be flapping “in a breeze” in videos and photographs.

But, as spaceflight historian Roger Launius of the Smithsonian’s National Air and Space Museum in Washington D.C., explained on the 40th anniversary of the first moon landing, “The video you see where the flag’s moving is because the astronaut just placed it there, and the inertia from when they let go kept it moving.”

Seriously, 7 percent of this country have no idea how basic, 6th grade, physics works? And these are registered voters. That means they have a legal right to decide who governs in this country. In case you wondered who elected the idiots we have now. So, when someone says your vote doesn’t count, remember this article.

Oh, and the girl in the video with the radar dishes in her boobs? She’s 100% real.

ASOCKALYPSE! The Movie NSFW (R) 2 from Carrie Schoenfeld on Vimeo.

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Creationists demand that only people who have first person experience of the events as they happened be allowed to teach evolution. Since there are no multi-million year old people running around they claim victory. Maybe they’ll accept the word of a guy who was born when Christ walked the earth. He was a Jew too. Just like Jesus. Then there are those who argue that only middle aged white men should be able to tell minority women what to do with their vaginae. They tend to base their argument on the long held scientific research espoused in Leviticus. As noted in a famous letter, that has led to some problems; Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians? And it does seem that the majority of these arguments tend to originate in states where education and safety are considered luxuries.

Still, despite the long term harm to the gene pool these states represent, they have never been actually a threat to innocent life.

Until now.

Florida, of course it’s freaking Florida, has asked the governor to put a speed lane in for the death penalty even if they have to kill innocent people.

No, I am not making this up.

Bill Cotterell, of Reuters, has the whole, disturbing, story.

The Florida Senate sent Governor Rick Scott a package of capital-punishment reforms on Monday designed to prevent condemned killers from spending decades on Death Row, despite warnings that speeding up the legal appeals process could lead to innocent prisoners being executed.

The “Timely Justice Act” sets deadlines for condemned killers to file appeals, and for the state to proceed with issuing warrants after the Florida Supreme Court upholds death sentences.

It also sets competency standards for lawyers handling cases. To reduce the number of appeals alleging incompetent counsel, any attorney twice found to have provided “constitutionally deficient representation” will be suspended from handling death appeals for five years.

“Is swift justice fair justice?” asked Democratic party Senator Arthenia Joyner, a Tampa attorney who voted against the bill. “We have seen cases where, years later, convicted people were exonerated,” she said.

“I don’t see the reason for the swiftness, especially with DNA evidence that can exonerate,” said Senator Maria Sachs, who is also an attorney and a Democrat.

But Republican Senator Rob Bradley said, “this is not about guilt or innocence, it’s about timely justice.” Frivolous appeals designed only for delay are not fair to victims and their families, he said.

The act also requires the state Supreme Court to make annual reports to the Legislature on how many capital appeals have been pending more than three years. Attorneys found to have provided incompetent counsel would also be reported to the Florida Bar.

“Only God can judge,” Matt Gaetz, a Republican who sponsored the bill in the House of Representatives, said last week during House debate. “But we sure can set up the meeting.”

The House passed Gaetz’s bill 84-34 last week. Governor Scott, a conservative Republican, is expected to sign the changes into law.

Florida has 400 men and five women currently under death sentence, with the next execution set for May 29. Gaetz and backers of his bill said 155 have been on Death Row for more than 20 years and 10 have been there more than 35 years.

Staff analysis of Gaetz’s bill said the average time between sentence and execution, since Florida resumed executions in 1979, has been 13 years. The state has carried out 75 warrants in that time, second only to Texas, which has executed 496 convicted killers since 1976.

Richard Dieter of the Death Penalty Information Center in Washington, D.C., said 33 states currently have capital punishment, but Maryland is set to abolish it when that state’s governor signs a repeal law this week. Five states have repealed the death penalty in the past six years, Dieter said.

“There’s been a trend away from capital punishment,” said Dieter. “The number of sentences imposed in the country has declined by 75 percent since 1990 and only nine states carried out an execution last year.”

State Senator Darren Soto tried on Friday to raise the required jury vote from seven to 10 for death penalties. He said Florida is the only state allowing juries to recommend death by a simple majority of 7 to 5. He said Alabama is the only other state allowing non-unanimous death recommendations, which he said require 10 votes there.

Okay, did anyone else notice that the only person mentioned in this article with a college education opposed the bill? I don’t care if she’s a lawyer, she is literally the only one.

Second, and I hate to have to waste the internet to point out the obvious but, yes, it is about justice. We don’t kill people just to kill people. We are not the fucking Taliban. The reason there are so many restrictions on the death penalty is because it’s a one shot deal.

And every time those restrictions are relaxed our country has a bad habit of killing innocent people.

I should also mention that it is cheaper to give someone life in prison than kill them. That doesn’t mean I’m opposed to the death penalty, I’m not – there are some people who are truly evil, but I am opposed to using it to please whims.

I leave you with the words of Pennsylvania state Rep. Brian Sims (D) – “As a reminder, Mr. Speaker, I do believe this has been forgotten entirely by many of my colleagues today: Each of us put our hand on the Bible and swore to uphold the Constitution. We did not place our hands on the Constitution and swear to uphold the Bible.”

Here’s a video about other people who made good life choices.

Leningrad Cowboys – You’re My Heart You’re My Soul

Listen to Bill McCormick on WBIG (FOX! Sports) every Friday around 9:10 AM.
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