Month: May 2013

First off a quick warning for the more adventurous among you. More and more people are tossing up your sexy pics on sites without your permission. And, since people give them to them there is nothing you can do about it. Not really anyway. You can threaten and you can sue and, when all is said and done, your naked booty is still online. So you might want to consider if that candid of your privates is really that important to send. Can’t you just show your special someone in…

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Oh joy. It’s time, once again, for the idiot infused fear mongers to pollute our universe. Not satisfied with reality these losers will waste perfectly good oxygen by continuing to breathe. You know the miscreants I am loathing. The ones who prey on the gullible with their preposterous “end of times” scenarios. Bible.ca has listed 242 alleged occurrences of Armageddon. In case you’re easily confused, not one of them caused the end of the world. However, we live in a world where people think that “governments” can cause tornadoes, so…

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Regular readers know that I am not a big fan of McDonald’s. There is a whole section of our search engine dedicated to eviscerating them. I have written about everything from how their food will not decay, which is not natural, to how performance artists use Mc-food to kill insects. Just so we’re clear, I am not a fan. Now, that being said, I must give credit where credit is due. Charles Ramsey, the hero in Cleveland who rescued those three young women, has turned down reward money and tried…

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The world has never stopped looking for alternative food sources. And they have found some doozies. From the deep fried bug market in Thailand to the horse sashimi fetish in Kazakhstan, it seems that humans are always finding ways not to starve. And, I suppose, that’s a good thing. If we all starved to death who would we make fun of? Or, more importantly in our self centered world, who would make fun of us? For the record, I have tried a wide variety of foods. Including bugs and horse.…

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We live in very odd times. There are people who are, flat out, convinced that the government (a/k/a Obama) can create tornadoes at will. This is despite the fact that salting, or seeding, clouds is so wildly unpredictable (it can cause anything from rain to drought) that no one does it any more. So if something that simple eludes science I sincerely doubt they have secret tornado generating machines hidden somewhere. It isn’t like they can just toss a propeller in the atmosphere and have at it. This isn’t like…

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When I was a younger B3 I played team sports in school. I wasn’t real good at any of them but I tried, I had fun and I made friends. Which, when we’re discussing kids is probably the more valuable experience. Of course there was that one kid that everyone could tell was special. The kid who had real talent. And you all remember what parents and coaches would say to that kid; “You’d better keep your grades up or you’ll never get into college and be able to go…

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A while back I wrote about Miguel Alcubierre. He was the fun loving scientist who figured out how faster than light travel was possible without violating Einstein’s laws. He did this despite finding out that Jason Richwine said he didn’t have the intelligence of white, native, Americans. If I take that statement literally I think it means that Cochise was white. Which I am going to guess is a fact that will come as a shock to his generational progeny. Anyway, idiots aside, Miguel figured it out. But he was…

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Last year, after a lengthy court battle, Greek courts ruled that residents of the Isle of Lesbos could not sue women who called themselves lesbians. Yes, that was a real lawsuit. And, yes, that was a real result. So, now that that’s out of the way, let’s move on to other women’s issues. As the more astute among you may have noticed, despite the fact that I really, really like the feminine form, I am not a woman. Yet, despite that horrid shortcoming, I can, and do, sympathize with the…

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We’ve all been there. The one night stand that was not a very good idea. Whether the date was “Coyote Ugly” (so ugly you’d chew your arm off rather than wake him/her) or that downward spiral of realizing you were trapped with ten pounds of crazy stored in a five pound bag, doesn’t matter. What matters is that you’ve been there. As have I. However, there are people who don’t quite grasp the concept of leaving. Of walking out the door, catching a cab, going to breakfast and pretending this…

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The world has never needed an electric dog polisher. That hasn’t stopped someone from inventing one but my soul is heartened by the fact that it didn’t sell well. Although I am saddened that it sold at all. History is littered idea that should never have made it out of the bar. And you know that all of these ideas were hatched in bars. It is the only excuse for the brilliant children’s toy, Boner the Humping Dog. No, that’s not a typo. How about the beginner’s guide to Russian…

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