Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged

It is often claimed, wrongly, that the Vatican has the world’s largest porn collection. Given the many troubles besieging the church these days I thought Catholics should get some good news. By the way, the word Gospel is Greek for Good News. Nevertheless, it is refreshing to know that the pope isn’t sitting in a secret basement spanking one off to a copy of Big Uns. How did the rumor get started? Probably by some Puritanical half wit who saw the Vatican’s collection of Renaissance art. You know, that whole…

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Vacation Don’ts

When I was 7 years old my mother almost killed me. On purpose. We were on the traditional American vacation; driving for hours without stopping or seeing anything. The point of this particular automotive marathon was to get to the Rocky Mountains and do the Pikes Peak tour. Yes, the same Pikes Peak where I was nearly gutted by a moose about 13 years later. At the time I thought seeing a mountain would be “neat” and “cool” but in retrospect i should probably just stay the hell out of…

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It’s All Too Real

Do you ever take a moment to worry about humanity? I do. It kind of comes with the turf around here. It’s not just the residents of Florida, although they are cause for a pause, it’s just that people everywhere say and do some incredibly dumb things. That would be bad enough, I suppose, but then those self same people who have trouble with the usual reality try and impose their version of it on the rest of us. I’ll give you an example. There is one thing that pedophiles…

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PAR-TAY!

For the last six weeks I have been living a bourbon free existence. Not that I’ve been a vestal virgin it’s just that I have been trying to get healthy. Note I did not say healthier. Zombies would have qualified at that low level. As I told my buddy this morning I just do what the doctor tells me and I feel better every day. I have also lost about 6 inches off my waist and no longer look like I was filled with helium by some demented scientist. So…

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Korea Explained

Despite the gentle reassurances of Ambassador Dennis Rodman (yes, you now live in Bizarro world), not many people believe that North Korea is run by a sane person. Just last year the nice folks in Pyongyang threatened to turn Seoul into a “Sea of Fire.” That is different than Johnny Cash’s Ring of Fire. Also not as catchy. But the problem is that, for all the high comedy that North Korea provides, they also do have real nuclear weapons. The kind that go boom and make lots of people very…

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