Umm, Honey …..???

What's your name again?
What's your name again?

There are many universal experiences that bind us together. That awkward, yet tender, first real kiss. Sure it was usually a slobbery mess, yet we all look back on it fondly. Or maybe that first time you spent the night away from home. You put on a brave face and kept your lonliness to yourself. But you and I both know that you really missed your wubbie more than ever that night. Or it could be that wonderful moment when you drove solo for the first time. Sure, you felt cool and powerful but you were also scared as the true responsibility you bore was clearer than ever.

Even the first time we had sex. I don’t mean you and me specifically, I would have remembered that, I just used “we” as the grand catch all for humanity. In retrospect it was a moment of skyrockets and panting passions unleashed in a glorious frenzy of lust. The kind of stuff that has kept Harlequin Romance in business for, what seems like, millennia. In reality it was probably 30 seconds of fumbling culminated with a grunt.

Well, now, it seems we have one more experience to add to the pile. The, ever popular, unexpected threesome.

UPI reports that this is exactly what happened to a young couple in Sweden.

A Swedish burglary suspect swears he has no idea how he wound up in the home of a couple, licking the arm of a sleeping woman.

The 22-year-old man, whose name was not released, told police in eastern Sweden he had had a little too much to drink and didn’t remember anything about his alleged break-in.

In fact, The Local said Sunday, the suspect had demanded to know who the two strangers were and why they were in his house.

The Local said the incident, which took place a couple of months ago, began when the woman woke up and found herself sandwiched between her boyfriend and another man who was licking her arm. She nudged her boyfriend and asked him if he knew who other fellow was.

Go ahead and read that again. I’ll wait.

Hum de dum de dum hum mmmm.

Okay, cool, you’re back.

Now ask yourself this; what kind of relationship does this young lady have with her boyfriend that waking up with a stranger licking her arm doesn’t warrant an immediate call to the cops, or evoke a scream, but just a quick question to her BF to see if he knew who the dude was? Has this happened before? Has she woke up, found some random guy doing some random stuff to her and all she can think is “Oh that darn Sven. I wish he’d tell me when we’re having company. I would’ve worn the clean nightie”?

Obviously her reaction shows she wasn’t surprised. Which makes me wonder, is this sort of thing so common she’s justified reacting that way? And, more importantly, how do I get in on this?

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