Boring as Lint or Exciting New Art Form?

Being in media related industries for as long as I have, I tend to get jaded when the “Next Big Thing” is announced. 9 times out of 10 it’s just a rehash of someone else’s Previous Big Thing. And that was often based on the Other Big Thing that now’s been forgotten. If you want proof that those who forget history are doomed to repeat it, just visit any modern art gallery. What were once wallpaper designs in the late 60’s are now framed pieces and sold for the average guy’s annual salary.

Andy Warhol believed that there should be no division between consumer goods and art. So when he created something he liked, he just copied it. That little blending of philosophy and culture still has people arguing what is, or is not, art.

But what if we’ve all have missed the point entirely? What if art is simply any form of presentation that accomplishes its purpose? What if all those Celozzi-Ettleson commercials were actually mini-masterpieces simply because they made people want to buy cars? That’s the essential argument being made by Sondra Lowell. As David Moye from AOL News reports, she purposely creates movies which are so boring they put viewers to sleep.

Most filmmakers wouldn’t want to be told their films put people to sleep, but it’s a compliment to director Sondra Lowell.

In fact, putting people to sleep is her goal as the self-proclaimed inventor of a new genre she calls “film sleepy.”

Lowell has made two such films thus far. The first, “WebcamMurder.com,” is mostly shots of people sitting around in front of webcams 24/7, wondering how to get Web surfers to tune in on their uneventful lives.

“It sounds a lot more excited than it is,” she told AOL News.

The second is “Sublime Crime: A Subliminal Mystery,” and Lowell claims it is the first entirely subliminal mystery in history.

“It is a big step forward in movies worth sleeping through,” she said. “It is mostly a blank screen with flashes of plot and personal growth affirmations, accompanied by an unintelligible binaural soundtrack.”

So far, the critics are in agreement with Lowell about the quality of her work. For instance, the Los Angeles Times called WebcamMurder.com “the most boring talkie ever made,” and the reviews for “Sublime Crime” have been just as positive.

But Lowell didn’t start out wanting to make boring films. In her case, it’s a matter of making cinematic lemonade out of lemons.

“I’ve always wanted to make a movie but found I was good at putting people to sleep,” Lowell said. “I took classes at UCLA and the teachers would fall apart when I made a script. People would tell me that I didn’t understand how to make a story and told me the scenes should build on each other.

“I thought I was doing that, but people fell asleep. It took me awhile to realize I was on to something.”

That something was “film sleepy,” a genre that respects the idea that an audience has the right to grab 40 winks while the film is on the screen.

“People are so connected to the Internet or their smart phones that they need a way to let go,” she said.

Lowell believes that her films are a non-narcotic way for people to fall asleep, but admits all the evidence is apocryphal.

“I’ve showed these film to large audiences hoping to see if everyone falls asleep, but I fall asleep myself and can’t tell if anyone did,” she said.

I know you’re dying to check these cinematic masterpieces out, so just click here and be prepared for nap time.

The one minute trailer almost put me out.

The films, which cost under $500.00 each to create, are available on DVD if you’re insane. Lowell also offers a course in how to unleash your inner mediocrity. Oddly enough, Oprah isn’t making it a part of her new TV network.

I guess Ms. Lowell’s work is just too exciting for the masses at this time.