We’ve Got the Straight Poop Today

If you’re like me, and most of you have loved ones who pray that this is not so, you’re fascinated by the many derivations of poop. Yes, there is the more common vulgarism that has been immortalized as a Principia Religio. But that doesn’t have the same whimsy as poop. After all, you can say poop in front of your kids. After a bout with the flu you can say, in any forum, “Boy, is my pooper pooped.”

If you’re on the water, the poop deck is a wonderful place to be.

You can change an old song into Purple Poople Eater and kids will laugh for days.

Face it, gross as it may seem, poop is fun.

But what about folks who want to take their love of poop a step further? Well, they’re in luck. The Topeka Zoo (where else?) is selling painted elephant poop.

David Moye from AOL News has the scoop on the poop.

The Topeka Zoo is getting a trunk full of cash thanks to its newest gift products: dolls and gifts made from elephants’ poop.

It’s part of a fundraiser called My Pet Poo and here’s the straight poop: Volunteers take hunks of pachyderm dung and paint with into all sorts of fun designs.

“We’ve had requests to paint the poop to look like a Kansas City Chief or a Jayhawk from the University of Kansas,” said Kate Larison, the executive director of the Friends of the Topeka Zoo, the group doing the poop painting.

“One person even wanted a Green Bay Packer Cheesehead.”

The Topeka Zoo’s My Pet Poo fundraiser sells dolls made out of elephant poop.

Larison said the idea of taking the poop and repackaging came up a few weeks ago at a meeting, and the group decided not to make haste with waste and started selling the pieces this week.

Each piece of My Pet Poo sells from around $10 to $25 for custom projects. In addition, each piece is lovingly painted by a volunteer and comes with a certificate of authenticity proving the poop did come from an actual elephant.

“It’s like a Cabbage Patch Doll in that respect,” Larison pointed out.

I know what you’re thinking. “I could have had a nice elephant poop doll instead of that silly Cabbage Patch?” Trust me, I feel your pain.

If you’re in the mood to give someone a gift that, I guarantee, they don’t already have, David has links on his page so you can order. Besides, if you’re down in the dumps, what could be a better ‘pick-me-up’ than a painted ball of poop?