Flora Diddy Doo Diddy Dumb

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The lovely Ms. Ivy Pearl. Check out her new photo collection at http://www.facebook.com/Ivypearl100.

Florida is an interesting place. I have noted, on numerous occasions, that it is where the gene pool has gone to die. While crimes and idiocy happen everywhere they just seems to be more conspicuous in Florida. That being said, even a blind squirrel can find a nut once in a while so we must laud Florida when it has a good idea. Barbara Hijeck is reporting that Floridians are replacing flash mobs with cash mobs to support local businesses.

Flash mobs?

So yesterday.

Meet the Cash Mob.

The first cash mob is believed to have hit in Buffalo, NY then spread like an cash epidemic across the country.

Tampa’s Secret Cash Mob made its first hit last month at a boutique in Carrollwood where 40 mobsters armed themselves with at least $10 and showed up when the store opened to spend, spend, spend, reports WTSP News-10 in Tampa Bay.

On Friday, Feb. 10, 2012, Knox County Mayor Tim Burchett, along with an estimated 700-800 others from Knox and surrounding counties, took part in the first-ever Knox Cash Mob. The mob hit Emery’s 5 & 10 to show support for local small businesses.

You have to admit that this is an easy idea to duplicate and one that only has positive results. Someone will screw it up, I’m sure, but until then go for it.

Why am I so cynical, you ask, because this is a state that screws up beer.

After receiving a call, deputies found a 69-year-old woman with a swollen, cut and bruised face walking in the middle of a Dunnellon road, reports the Ocala Star-Banner.

She told the deputies that her hubby, Daniel Mofford, had been auguring with her over beer.

Deputies found Mofford, 55, asleep in the back of a pick-up truck that was parked in the back of a barn.

Yes, it’s a sad, sad truth: They’ll kill you for a beer in Florida.

In other beer related news in Florida

Palm Bay: Alan Tanguay was only 16-years-old when he reportedly stabbed his 58-year-old Palm Bay neighbor 37 times — just so he could steal $6 for a beer

Immokalee: Man savagely beaten for his beer

Kissimmee: Tiff over beer led to stabbing, deputies say

Remember Eduardo Adolfo Gonzalez?

He pleaded guilty for murdering a man over a spilled beer.

He was also charged with putting an apparent murder plot into motion from behind bars in an effort to kill witnesses to the spilled beer murder.

I really need say no more.

Let’s see, what else could they possibly screw up in Florida? How about getting run over by a car? How do you screw that up? Run yourself over.

A woman trying to retrieve her mail was run over by her own car Thursday in the suburban Boynton Beach community of Oakwood Lakes, Fla.

The car, an older model Oldsmobile Toronado was in reverse when Gilda Bartlett, 82, stepped out to fetch her mail on Thursday afternoon.

“The door was wide open and it hit her, it knocked her down,” Bartlett’s neighbor Bob Curcio told news channel WPTV.

According to the Palm Beach County Sheriff’s report, the woman was dragged backward for about 30 feet. Witnesses said Bartlett was hit several times by the car as it circled the pavement. Neighbors then dragged her to safety.

The vehicle continued in a circular motion, maintaining a speed of about 10-15 miles an hour. “It started making loops, this way, to the left, counterclockwise,” Curcio told WPTV. “It just kept on going.”

Firefighters and police responded, trying in vain to stop the car by flattening the tires.

“They tried the strip of nails and that didn’t work,” witness Tom Bilinski told WPTV.

Rammed by patrol car
Firefighter Jody Marlow tried to jump into the vehicle and stop it, but was thrown from the car and suffered minor injuries, the report said. The Oldsmobile was eventually stopped by a sheriff’s deputy, who rammed it with his patrol car.

Bartlett is in serious but stable condition at Delray Medical Center, according to the sheriff’s office.

Bartlett’s granddaughter told WPTV the woman had no broken bones, but she had a big cut on the back of her head that had to be stapled.

What else could these people screw up? Facebook. Seriously, I know it seems impossible but a … oh, just read this.

Steven Mulhall, 21, of Coral Springs, posted a photograph of himself holding a stolen nameplate, which was pried from the door of a Broward Circuit judge’s courtroom on his girlfriend’s Facebook account, according to arrest records, reports the South Florida Sun-Sentinel.

“The nameplate is like only $40, not that big of a crime, but what an idiot. He puts it on Facebook,” said Broward County Sheriff Al Lamberti. “Here he is flaunting it on Facebook. He violated the terms of his parole by stealing, from a judge no less. He’s got multiple convictions for petty theft, so now this is a felony.”

But Bill, that’s just one loser, not a trend.

HA!

Sarasota: Facebook request gets man kicked off jury

Orange County: Mom sent death threats to 8th grader, deputies say

Charlotte County: Teen busted after taking pic on church roof for Facebook

Niceville: Report: Woman hacked into another person’s Facebook, send ‘provocative’ photos of ex

Lakeland: Facebook photo of stolen puppy leads to arrest

Tampa: Man posted Facebook photos of illegally killed animals, FWC says

Haines City: Man exchanged photos of illegally killed game with FWC

South Daytona: Accused fraudster taunts her victims with defiant photo on Facebook

Brooksville: Couple jailed after Facebook fracas

Palm Bay: In your face: Man arrested after fight over Facebook status

Florida Keys: Teen breaks into ICE agents’ cars, boasted on Facebook

Citrus County: Busted! Facebook photos nab deer slayers

And on and on it goes.

So there you have it, they had one good idea, that is destined to fail sooner rather than later and they have oranges.

Listen to Bill McCormick on WBIG (FOX! Sports) every Friday around 9:10 AM.



About Bill McCormick

I'm just this guy who's survived the entertainment industry.